London Times Obituary
An Obituary printed in the London Times........
'Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend,
Common Sense, who has been with us for many years.
No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth
records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.
He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable
lessons as: Knowing when to come in out of the rain; why
the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't always fair;
and maybe it was my fault
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies
(don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies
(adults, not children, are in charge).
His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned
but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a
6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a
classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash
after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly
student, only worsened his condition.
Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for
doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in
disciplining their unruly children.
It declined even further when schools were required to get
parental consent to administer sun lotion or an Aspirin to a
student; but could not inform parents when a student became
pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.
Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became
businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their
victims. Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend
yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar
could sue you for assault.
Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman
failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled
a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.
Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and
Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; his son,
Reason.
He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers;
I Know My Rights
I Want It Now
Someone Else Is To Blame
I'm A Victim
Not many attended his funeral because so few realized
he was gone. If you still remember him, may want to pass this on.
If not, join the majority and do nothing.
